Disappointment And Expectations
When we realize and neutralize our expectations it leads to great freedom and experiences better than we can imagine.
We are in a perfect time to unravel every expectation, pattern and limitation – if we want to.
We certainly can hold on tight to the world the way it is and fight for every singe limitation we imagine… Or… We can choose to become aware of our limiting thoughts and beliefs that actually are creating our reality.
Once we are aware of them, we can neutralize them. Then we have a blank canvas to create a life we love.
Let me show you how this worked for me last week. We went to Canada for a ski vacation over spring break. I didn’t do any research into where I was going. My husband planned it all, as usual. For some reason I thought French speaking Canada was west coast, but turns out, it is here in the east.
Montreal in Quebec is very much French speaking. All the buildings looked European. The people looked and carried themselves as European.
This was not what I was expecting! I had in my mind flannel shirt wearing, friendly, lumberjack types. Kindness oozing from crevices I didn’t even know existed. Canadians have that reputation, ya know?!
Well, I didn’t really like France. I really didn’t like French people because they tend to think they are better than everyone. (forgive me Caroline, this never included you) I was looking for a grounding American experience – I did not want to have to look at all this.
I had a day or so that were pleasant, but I encountered person after person who looked down on me because I didn’t come prepared to speak French. Or I wasn’t fashionable enough, or whatever their problem was with me…
But you know what? when I actually sat down with my judgement, my judgement that French people are wrong in their attitude. All the while not having judgement for myself for still carrying judgement. Just loving the parts of me that were judgmental. Loving the parts of me that felt small and judged when I was in my 20’s first traveling internationally. I invited all my ancestral pain related to France to rise and transmute. (I found that was the BIGgest piece) I managed to neutralize all that judgement.
All this moves at light speed for me now.
Then, lo and behold, I started to have really nice interactions with people in restaurants. Out and about people started to smile at me whenever they caught my eye. I was actually having a very grounding American experience, just with a more European backdrop than I was expecting. You know what else? I started to find better foods for my body than you would normally find in a ski village. I also magically started to be able to translate the language when I read it on signs and menus. I had always had a mental block with the French language even though I could read Spanish, Italian and Portuguese to some extent.
I got exactly what I needed, even if I didn’t know I needed it. A restful week, a less judgmental me, food to nourish my body, some family fun and some magic!
There are so may ways to neutralize your expectations and your judgements. Knowing they didn’t really start with you helps, and looking at them with love and compassion is my favorite.